And I still haven't left

I have definitely fallen in love with this city.

My days have been spent walking around the city, up the hill to hang out with Jesus, sunbathing on the beach and playing in the waves, surfing, and going out with others from the hostel. I'm actually slightly worried that my travelling has come to a bit of a stand still for a while. I was initially supposed to be spending only 2 days here but since then I have extended my stay twice and am currently staying here until Monday.

Two days ago was the Fiesta de San Juan (which I believe coincides with Summer Soltice - the longest day of the year.) The celebration of this day begins by the burning of a tree in the town hall and then afterwards the peeling and distribution of the bark to everybody huddled around. What they do with the bark I'm not sure. At first I thought that the ate it, but now I'm not quite sure. This is then followed by everybody making bonfires on the beach and throwing in pieces of paper with their wishes and dreams written on them. The ages of the people who get involved in this ranges from young children to older men and women.

What was even better was that night I went surfing from 9pm to 11pm and so I saw the sunset out on the horizon and the bonfires on the beaches, from the water, and it was absolutely gorgeous. I found a new respect for life out there on the water, it's hard to explain.

I have been hanging out with many of the sole travellers at the hostel but mainly two girls, Jemma from Australia, who has also seemingly taken up residence here, and Pam, who runs the hostel and is from Argentina. They are both very much free-spirited women and we get along very well. During the day we go to the beach and in the nights we go out on the town.

Here the night life begins at around 11pm - midnight and goes until 4am (at the earliest). I have had two 4:30- 5am nights and really don't see how the locals here can keep this up (but perhaps the siesta in the middle of the day is a key part of it. The nightly ritual/custom here in Spain is to begin your night with some tapas which you choose from a wide selection displayed on the bar, and then continue to bar hop from anywhere between 3 and 5 bars. Luckily there is no cover here and you don't feel like you have to have many drinks at each bar.

Tonight is another night of celebration, so I have heard, with a large outdoor concert on the beach. What tonight will bring, only time will tell.

My first stop in Spain and I don't think I want to leave

At first sight of San Sebastian, on the Atlantic coast of Spain, I was in love. There are old, gothic buildings lining the river that spills into the ocean and hills spiking up around the outskirts of the city. When we arrived it was a dark and rainy day but out on the water surfers were scattered everywhere. There were people running and biking aroung the city and people strolling, chatting, and enjoying themselves everywhere.

Under each sign in Spanish was written a funny looking word which could be none other than Basque, a language which its origins are supposably unknown (though one person here stated that it was from the Celts who at one time had inhabited this area.) It feels good to be back in a language that I understand, more-or-less, but I must say that these Spaniards do speak Spanish in a weird way; they all sound like they have a speech impediment.

I had arrived by car, with my mum and Pedro, from Agen. On our way we stopped in a city called Biarritz, in France, which was once a very popular and expensive vacation destination for the rich English. The architecture and large buildings showed just that, as well as the cost of a very small amount of goat cheese and tomatoes. But it was beautiful and I became excited was again about the idea of discovering new places and having my own little adventure.

After leaving Biarritz we discovered that our GPS no longer recieved any satellite reception and we had no maps to tell us how to get to and around San Sebastian, and Pamplona, where she and Pedro were headed that night. Using a saved map I found on the GPS we made our way into San Sebastian and to a place where we thought that my hostel may be located. Not wanting to drive around one way streets any more I got out of the car and started walking. I located my hostel in a side street that was filled with bars and postings all of the walls. It had no sign. I started to get worried that this place was going to be a complete shit-hole and actually asked some people nearby if this was a decent part of time. After ensuring me that it was I proceed to ring the bell and be led up the stairs.

The hostel is great. It is small, yet has everything, and cosy, yet has many activities and events that they organize for the visitors. Within 30mins of arriving at the hostel I was back out the door, but this time with two other guests and we were on our way to a surfing class. Within 1 hour of arriving in San Sebastian I was out on the water surfing! What more could I possible ask for.

Tomorrow, the world is my oyster and I have plans to do it all. I will go back for some more surfing, hike up the hill to stand next to the local Jesus statue, and maybe even go shopping for a pair of jeans to replace the old ones I riped a hole in the crotch in whilst biking, just before I left. Tomorrow will be a great day!!

A LOT of time spent with family

After having been by myself in Nice for a number of days I was very much looking forward to having people I know around to do activities with. I quickly found out that I very much like my independence and being able to decide what I am going to do and when. Not to say that I haven't enjoyed visiting with my family, I definitely have, but it was good feeling to know that I also really enjoy being by myself, which is something I will be doing more and more of throughout this trip.

Here I have spent my days travelling around the countryside visiting medieval villages, churches, and casteles, as well as eating, drinking, and debating an exorbitant amount. The food has been delicious beyond belief, the wine has been flowing more than ever, the discussion have been more intense and ongoing, and the medieval villages have been far older than I have ever seen, and becoming more similar to one another each time I see a new one.

The lack of physical activity has been quite difficult for me, as most of you know, I'm quite obsessively active and enjoy my daily bike rides, yoga practices, etc, etc. Riding in cars has not been the most enjoyable part for me and I have had to get myself up and going on runs a couple of times since I've been here.

Two major reasons why we have done so much car rides and less walking and hiking is, one, because the weather has had a turn for the worst and has been rainy and miserable, and two, my Grandpa can no longer go for the long hikes and walks like he used to.

For 84 he is actually doing quite well, but the knees are starting to hurt after a bit of walking around and his gout tends to act up due to all the drinking and eating that we do throughout the day. As well, a year ago or so he was diagnosed with Alzheimer's which I notice that it has taken quite a strong grip on his independence and short-term memory.

That being said we have gone to see cave paintings in Lascoux from the time of cavemen, which was very interesting, though a bit disappointing seeing that we found out that they were actually (very well done) replicas and that the floor of the cave was covered in a plastic flooring. The cave was found in the late 1800s by two boys who fell into it whilst looking for their dog. It was then closed to the public in 1963 due to the decompensation of the wall paintings because of the increased carbon dioxide and moisture in the air from the number of people entering the caves.

Another very interesting site that we visited was Lourdes. This is a city where catholics from all over France and Europe do pilgrimages to. In the mid 1800s a young girl had a number of appirations of Mary in a nearby cave which directed her to a a water source that she said had healing qualities. She then brought this news to the fellow towns people who came and drank from the spring. It was said that the miracles occured from the sick and injured people drinking and bathing in these waters. To this day people still come from miles and miles away to do the same and still believe that the waters have healing powers. It is amazing the strength of belief and the powers of religion. I'm not saying that these miracles have not happened, because there are old letters all over the place that thank St. Bernadette for curing their ailments showing the evidence that soemthing did happen, it is just amazing to see the number of people who flock here every day.

All-in-all I have had an amazing time here, but I think that it is time to move on. I fear that if I keep up all this eating, drinking, and car riding I am going to need to buy the cojoining seat for my plane ride back in December.

From beaches to country-side

About a week or so ago I left Nice, and its beautiful beaches, to travel to Agen, and its beautiful countrysides, via a short stay in Carcassone. I took the train from Nice to Montpellier where I missed my next train, due to the delay of my first train, but managed to rearrange my ticket and got on the next train to Carcassone where my Mum and Pedro were waiting for me.

When I arrived we drove through Carcassone, which we would visit more in-depth the next day and continued on to Malvies, a small village in the country where we were going to reside for the, following two nights. Upon arrival in the village we had a very difficult time trying to find the hotel, as it turns out that it was actually somebody's second house that they were renting out. Thankfully, a nosey old woman stuck her head out the door and asked what we were doing, and with my broken French we found our way to the 'hotel.'

It was a very old house with a patio outside, swimming pool, and enough space for us to spread our things all around. The owner's were a bit peculiar though. The woman, who was originally from Canada and had moved to England when she was young, was a very friendly yet aggressive woman who pointed out very quickly that if we broke anything or did anything wrong than we would be paying for it. She even went as far as to mention that she had my VISA number on file! All-in-all it was a pleasant stay though.

The first (and only) full day that we were there we went in to Carcassone to see one of the most well-kept and well-preserved castles in the region. There are bits and pieces of ancient walls all around the south of France which they proudly call castles, and any village with a bit of old wall around it is called a Bastide. The castle, and surrounding walled village where people still live, in Carcassone was very impressive indeed and we spent the majority of the day walking around. Unfortunately my camera was either stolen or lost in Nice, and so I was unable to take any photos of the structure, but luckily my mum had her camera so we weren't completely at loss.

It is fascinating to see so much history spewed about everywhere. You can't help but envy the richness and antiquity of all the small, and large, buildings, of the bridges, and of the cobble-stone pavements. Of course you have the McDonalds and H&Ms mixed in with it all, but even they have been designed in a very respectful way. Well perhaps not the McDonalds, but the street stores have been.

The day after we were back in the car and on the Dunes, a small village near Agen where my Grandpa and his wife have a beautiful house (with pool!)

History - what Vancouver seems to lack

Today I took the train and visited a nearby city called Antibes. It is an old walled city, south of Nice, on the seaside where Picasso spent a bit of time working in an old castle there, which has now been turned into a museum of his works.

I have found that the way I like to discover a new place is just to walk, with no set plans or directions, and so that is what I did. I found the 'old city' which is located inside the walls and peaked into all the narrow streets and open windows. As always the buildings and streets reeked of history and times past. The window shutters had been chipped away and repainted so many times that they have an ancient textured look to them.

Unfortunately there not too many of Picasso famous paintings, but I found that this one in particular spoke to me. To me it looks like a person huddled up in a ball and resembles fear and a feeling of inadequacy. Even though there weren't many of his finest pieces it was amazing to thing of being in that building and working away in front of his canvases.

Do you recognize this guy? Unfortunately, it seems his brother in the West End of Vancouver is not a one-of-its-kind. But the one in France is bigger. The both actually originated from a Spanish artist from Barcelona.

Eating alone is not an easy feat.

In the last couple of days I have spent so much time outside that I seem to have gotten a non-stop headache from the sun. Combined with a cold that has come on and won't let me walk or sleep or do anything without needing to cough every 2 seconds, I'm feeling a bit nasty. I'm feeling so bad that I have not been able to take advantage of the incredible cheap wine offered at every restuarant. Oh the terrors, oh the hard life. I can feel your sympathy.

Yesterday I spent the day laying on the beach, reading and sleeping, after a bit of a non-successful walk around town wearing the wrong kind of shoes. I find it easy to be by myself in situation such as these; walking and suntanning by myself does not bother me.

What I do find difficult are meal times, which I have missed a number of due to my fear around my lack of French and my embarrasement at being seen as a lonely somebody sitting by myself. The first time it took me an hour of walking to finally find somewhere I found safe enough and where I could get up the guts to ask for a table. Yesterday it took slightly less, but not by much.

Going up to people and asking for things has always been difficult for me to do and so doing this in another country is just frightening. Yesterday I made myself go into a bakery and ask for bread and brioche. Upon departure (with bread and brioche in hand) I was ecstatic and on such a high from my conquer that I didn't know what to do with myself. It are these small things that are so big and terrifying in my life that I am here to set straight. So ...

Goal #1: Learn to enjoy and relish eating alone in a restuarant full of couples and happy-go-lucky people.

1 hour in and I've been picked up by an old, dirty sailor

I arrived in Nice this morning after a16 hour journey and only 2 hours of sleep. As we flew into the airport I noticed that it was situated right next to the ocean, and the ocean was a brilliant turquoise!! My heart jumped with the sight of this.

Though I was exhausted from the trip I was determined to go explore Nice and not take a nap until later (which would also lead to terrible jet lag.) I wandered through the old streets with the gorgeous architecture and small balconies and windows on every building. Nice is quite large but gives off the feeling of being a small quaint city for the majority of it. I made my way down to the seaside and cursed myself, on arrival, for not having brought my bathing suit with me. The beaches are not sand but pebble and large rocks making them feel very natural and serene, but also slightly painful. There are groups of young people, families, and older people everywhere, and a jaw-dropping number of speedos (though they actually don't look too bad on a number of men here - perhaps it's the tan.)

I found a spot to sit down and started people watching and reading a book. Not 15mins after getting there an older man sits down and starts speaking to me. Hoping that my lack of French would deter him and I would be left alone to take in the scenery alone I was quite surprised when he continued to speak me both in French and English. It turns out that he was a sailor on one of the ships docked currently in Nice and that would be really happy if I would allow him to take me out for a ride. Finally he left me to return to his ship alone. Unfortunately that just made an opening for another guest.

This time he was a younger man who was quite sweet and personable, though got odder as the day went on. After talking for a while we ended up going for a walk up a hill on the seaside where you can look over the whole of the city. It was beautiful and it was good to have his company, for a period of time. He eventually also left and I was then able to roam the streets once more by myself picking up some fruit and pastries on my way back to the hostel.

It's now 9pm and I'm going to bed. I'll get up the nerve tomorrow to socialize with the others residing at the hostels; I think I've enough challenges for one day. I wonder what tomorrow will bring?

And so it begins

So here I am, in Nice. It has been a weird couple of days prior to the flight as I had to pack up my apartment, give my cat to friends, end my job, and say good-bye to many friends.

I decided on this trip back in December 2009 and at that point the idea was exciting and invigorating, and now as I listen to the people around me speaking French and look at the completely different scene it's weird to think that I won't be back in Vancouver for 6months - 1 year.

The goal of this trip is for me to stop over-thinking everything in my life and to just be and feel. In January my friend Parrish had the idea to get a number of us together to create collages of visions we had for 2010. My collage focused on learning about myself and doing this by forcing myself to leave my comfort zone and start doing difficult and challenging things.

I have actually done quite well in this, so far, as I have competed (and completed) the 34km mountain race in Costa Rica and participated in a traditional Peruvian ceremony that forced me to look at some of my most prevolent issues. But I think this trip is going to be the hardest and most useful in learning about myself.

I have to thank so many people who have supported me through the last few difficult years, I would not be where I am today if it weren't for all of your compassion, friendship, and help. I have to especially thank Ashley, and she knows why. She has been by my side through thick and thin, through bad times and good times. I never could have imagined that I would have a friend like you. You are my rock. I will see you in December for your wedding!!!!